| Soya Says

The problem with the ‘Sharma Ji ka beta’ Approach!

when parents compare you to sharmaji ka beta - The problem with the 'Sharma Ji ka beta' Approach!

We have all been there. We have all seen the ‘Sharma ji ka beta’ memes. Chances are, we have been compared to a ‘Sharma ji ka beta’ in our childhood at least once. Be it the usual exam scores or any of our ‘bad’ habits. For those of us that have been compared much more often, ‘Sharma ji ka beta’ tends to become the ultimate yardstick of success. Being a winner or achieving success in life becomes getting a step ahead of ‘Sharma ji ka beta’, nothing more than that.

Fast forward some years and if your belief gets stronger, the situation will only worsen. You are inclined to find ‘Sharma ji ka betas’ everywhere including among friends, relatives, colleagues and neighbors. Your new phone needs to be the technologically advanced version, your car needs to be the higher end model and your TV needs to be wider than whoever-you-consider-to-be-the-‘Sharma ji ka beta’-in-your-life.

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Your efforts become meaningless. It doesn’t matter how hard you may have tried and whether you reached your goal (if you had one), it all seems hollow if you couldn’t outdo ‘Sharma ji ka beta’. Not just that, over time, you might start avoiding contests where winning against ‘Sharma ji ka beta’ seems unlikely.

Get over the ‘Sharma Ji ba Beta’ syndrome

If you can’t get over this line-of-thinking, question yourself, what are the things you enjoy doing? What are the activities you indulge in without the need to be better than somebody else? What makes you happy inherently without the feeling of competing against someone? For instance, I blog, I run. I enjoy these activities. I don’t want to be better than anyone at these except for improving myself.

Look at the famous personalities you admire. Imagine if they had spent their lives with the only life goal of getting better than a ‘Sharma ji ka beta’.

the rat race - The problem with the 'Sharma Ji ka beta' Approach!

Yes, you may have realized by now that this is an unending rut. It is a rat race. Life isn’t about constantly running the rat race. If you must, compete with yourself. Become the best possible version of yourself. As long as you are better than what you were yesterday, you are on the right track. Keep moving forward.

Stop leading a life in the permanent disability of comparisons.

At the core, the problem is the fact that people don’t want to rise by making themselves better because that requires loads of efforts and commitment. They rather try to make others smaller by criticizing, ridiculing and one-upping them. Don’t compete with a ‘Sharma ji ka beta’, be a ‘beta’ that doesn’t care about the Sharmas and the Vermas around!

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